With the beginning of every academic year, Outlook or India Today, publish its report on Top 10 B-schools/ Engineering Colleges/ Grad. College and so on. So I was just wondering If they could conduct a survey for me, finding out the top 10 friends of me.
The concept seems to be absurd. However I find some similarities between the two.
Last year they conducted the survey across the country covering over 12 metroes, 9,151 cities and 374971 villages to find out the Best engineering colleges of our country, Even I have Friends across the nation in over 02 metoes, 0005 cities and 000001 village, so the survey seems to be quite extensive this time as well (no pun intended)
Last year they published the report of Top 10 Colleges, Though we already knew the outcome, Same will happen with this report(We already knew the outcome)
Nobody give a DAMN about that report, because you will take admission on the basis of your marks and not the survey, so will be the fate of this survey.
They will publish that same report next year with new advertisement, I promise I will do the same (Though advertisement is an issue for me).
Since India Today/Outlook and the likes may be busy doing the same survey this year I decided to conduct this survey through the help of a NGO
" KOI_aur_KAAM_nai_HAI"(KAKNH)
"Toh Bhakht jaano, shuru karo kaam lekar kaam dev ka naam" (Kaamdev is type of dev, saachi,google it)
#Name: Coco
Occupation: Probationary Officer, Bank Of India,
Trait: Huh?? Haaa?? What?? Kab?? and ????
Friend Since: 1998
Coco Is the reincarnation of fool bird DODO. He is irritatingly slow in understanding everything. He will laugh only when you will tell him that "Abe yeh joke tha itna serious kyun ho raha hai" 
He may believe you if you will say Nepal cancelled its plan of invading China, because Bhutan urges not to do so (no pun intended). Sometimes ignorance and simplicity is strenght and he is master of that.
# Name : Google
Occupation: MBA College, 2nd Year Student, Meerut
Trait: Half baked knowledge
Friend Since : 1994
You have a doubt?? Ask google. He will quench your curiosity at least for a moment. He is wikipedia of all slangs. He can turn lyrics of any song into "gaaliyon ki dukaan" letting you wonder what will happen if his lyrics will be filmed (At least censor board waalon ke kaan se khoon aa jayega). He is the one who has given all of us a name of course @#%&@% type.
# Name: Mr. Cricket
Occupation : Part time Cricketer Full time vellapanti
Trait : Casanova
Friend since: 2000
He is undoubtedly the best baller I have ever faced (Though I am the worst Batsman the world have seen so far), a maverick batsman, and an athlete in the field, a complete package for cricket. Casanova by nature, he can be easily spotted near girls school/girls hostel/college/saari dukan/chatt puchka thela and every other like place.
#Name: Mr. Gumshuda
Occupation: 4th year Engineering college, Tamil Nadu
Trait: UNKNOWN
Friend Since: 1996
He is the Rancho from 3 idiots, always busy in his thoughts. He could be spotted smoking his tension and wrestling with his thoughts. He is a friend in a need. Considering super silence he maintains around him I am refraining number of words for him.
#Name: Miss Nautanki
Occupation: Mass comm. and Part time Tv actress
Trait:Centre of universe
Friend since: 2004
She is the eye candy of our group. Everyone from this group,of course except me, has a huge crush on her. She consider herself to be the centre of every ones universe. She is a complete showoff. She can be easily spotted near mirror. Considering the number of profile pic she has in her facebook, Zukerberg is planning to buy a new server to accommodate the new pics that she might upload.
# Name: Chameleon
Occupation: PG 1st year From IIT Delhi
Trait: Weird
Friend Since: 1999
He is the most weired creature I have ever met. He can spit venom more than a viper and can easily change his side(Actually he takes his side only). A self proclaimed Kaamino ka sardar , doing justice with his tag.
#Name : Massss
Occupation : Bangalore, 4th year, Engineering College
Trait: Pride/Honesty/Integrity/Values/Principals/BORING
Friend Since: 2001
I doubt If there is any another person in the world with such a disinterest towards anything that sounds interesting. He is a misfit to this 21st century. The fellow should have been born in stone age. In a way he resembles CHATUR RAMLINGAM from 3 Idiots. He was a darling of teachers during our school days (I envy you for this man) and I bet he is still enjoying the same position in his college. A very good son, a good brother, a good friend, a good student, a good TENANT , a good scooter driver, and a very good learner. We love you buddy and respect all your good qualities. Irrespective of what we say you are the ONE !!!!
# Name : Poo
Occupation: Cipla, Trainee
Trait: Beauty with Brain
Friend since: GOOGLE allowed me to be a Friend
Dressed in a very elegant style and struggling with medical jargon's, she could easily draw anybodies attention. A girl from a Brahman orthodox family taking about beer/vodka/whisky, and being a very Fun loving, very friendly, outgoing, unreserved, and a showboat is difficult to find but a gem to keep forever.
I firmly believe that happy girls are prettiest girls
Though the name " Band Of Brothers" seems to be absurd since there are girls as well, but had I named it " Band of Brothers and Sisters" (Oh yukkkk I feel like puking), seriously I would have been killed. It should rather be named as "Chuddy buddy"
And Yes I don't feel ashamed of making fun of you guys.
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