I know She is hot! No! Not just hot, She is Sun! But then even I am not Tushaar Kapoor. I am not John Abraham but then not even Johnny Lever either. So, I think you got the gist, I am not bad looking, ok , ok, if you all are insisting , I am accepting it
"I AM SEXY BEAST"
It has become so difficult to be humble these days.
Well the fact is recently a NGO, " Koi-aur-kaam-nai-hai " , declared me as the 1021 most desirable person in an intergalactic survey. Rumors has it; that inspired by the incident that took place in Dubai recently RAW and other governmental agencies are planning to deport me out of India, because of the provocativeness I am radiating after my breakup with Her.
People like Arvind Kejriwal has already given statement in CNN-IBM that bewitching personality like Mr. Double Bottle is a threat to nation's security. If we will be elected we will bring strong Lokpal that will put a check on awesomeness radiating by him.
Well, to cut the crap and coming to the point.
Sathiyo lagao chopal aur shuru ho jao aaj ka batola !! We are discussing that awesome moment when your shona, betu, jaanu, bachu turns into Ek thi dayan.
With the planet size brain that I have, I know what XY Chromosomes of Homo Sapiens aka Bechara Mard faces these days after break-up. So to lessen the pain and agony of my fellow beings I, in association with Professor pony tail Arindum Choudhary, have identified few Break up ke Good Effects.
Let me introduce Professor D K Boss Arindum Choudhary first, he is the writer of great literary work Count your chicken before they Bullshit and Discover the diamond in you (translated in Hebrew as Screw yourself before some one else screws you)
1) Social Stigma:- Single stags are like AIDS, Jo chune se nai phailta but people are afraid of it. Once you are single you become a threat. A threat for boringly forever after couples. You become a temptation for girls. Suddenly, people start considering you as fuckawesome as the Korean Guy who discovered Ganganam Style. So enjoy the moment.
2)Vicky Donor: Now you don't have to waste natural resource in you, I believe this is diamond in you, which Prof Choudhary is talking about. Learn it from Vicky and donate it as generously as you can.
3) Booze: Drink like a fish. Now you don't have to give a damn second thought whether to drink a desi or videshi, to go in shit expensive bar or to have it on terrace.
4) Har Ek friend jaruri hota hai:- So, you can go back to your friends. Do all the mawalipanti, lukhapanti and haramipanti with your chuddy buddies. Enjoy the freedom.
5) Apna sapna money money:- With no one to coil around like a snake on your hard earned money, you can aaram se do future planning. Have you ever imagined that the money you have spent on her, you could have bought a play-station or a punch bag or a latest mobile gizmo for yourself.
Disclaimer:- (Please read the disclaimer with the same speed which that Mutual fund dude reads)
Care must be taken to ensure that above advantages should not be overused, as it might backfire.
